sleep...

I have been doing OK. I am still bleeding but it is down to a trickle now. Not much in the way of clots but two days ago I swear I passed a marble. Strangest thing, it was so round and hard. It didn't seem to be anything but clot but who knows.

Emotionally I am OK with tears on and off and anger peeking in every so often. I AM, however, doing that 'depression-staying up late thing.' I am sure many of you know it well. It is where you stay up flipping through channels on the TV and watching all sorts of crap shows all trying to keep your head from talking too much. I have always been the type who has the hardest time when I lay down to sleep, that is my loudest "head" time. So I have been up until 12 or 1 many days in a row. The thing is that is still getting 6 hours of sleep, which is a lot compared to my younger days, but I have been dying in the mornings lately. Yesterday my whole body ached, my legs and arms and back and neck, I was just so tired. Roomie told me to take a nap at like 9:30 or so. I agreed as I was just in so much pain. I woke up at 1:30!!!!!!! I was so shocked.

So last night I decide I have got to get to bed at a decent hour. So in the early evening I decide I will make a cocktail before bed and try that. Well, we had no Tequila or Vodka so roomie ran out to get some. I made a nice margarita before bed after Bliss was fast asleep. I sipped it (such a pathetic drinker these days) until it was gone, and it was large. I went to bed by 10:30 which was good. I woke up in hell. Oh people I have not had a hangover in a long time. I only had one drink. I am thinking it is likely I had a hangover because of the Metformin I am still on, but ouch. Head in vice around eyebrows not a fun way to wake up.

So tonight I am planning on just going to sleep with Bliss when he does. I will get through this, it is just a slow process.