Friday, February 22, 2008

shit...

First to answer some questions and then some stuff.

I am not RH negative, nor is the donor. My mother was so I have always known I was not.

I took Dexamethasone until almost a week after transfer. I will ask about taking it longer but when I got my positive beta and asked he said he didn't think it necessary. I am sure he will allow me to stay on it if and when I get pregnant again.

My doc isn't very pro D&C and usually does either natural or uses Cytotec to cause cervical dilation and allow the embryos to pass. I am waiting up to a week and then will consider the Cytotec. I tend to have a cervix of steel when it is closed.

I have been tested for NK's and APA's and all that. I have some APA's but no NK's.

I will be doing another fresh IVF as soon as my HCG is at zero. I will go through this hell until I have a baby, I just have to find a better way to live my life on hold than I have been of late, Bliss deserves more.

I do not think IVIG would be useful but will be asking about it. I have no idea how I would ever pay for it though.

I really really wanted twins, so much so it surprised me.

I am currently typing and drinking coffee.

I take Selenium every day and have since my last thyroid surgery (it is supposed to help clear antibodies from your system).

I take high Folic Acid with High B6 every day for auto-immune issues.

I take low dose aspirin daily.

I am pretty numb. I go through crying jags, but for the most part I am numb with bitter simmering below the surface. So far I am doing fairly well at not listening to my head say shitty things to me.

The antibodies will likely come back fine, although I think it was something I almost wanted to grab on to as something to blame.

I asked the doctor if testing the embryo's would yield us helpful info if they were tested, and if it can be covered on my insurance. I would have a D&C if this is the case and my doc thinks it is a good idea, especially because twins would give even more info.

I am waiting to hear back about the testing stuff now.

5 om's.:

vee said...

Hang in there. I hope you get some answers, and I hope they help some.

mrsbluemont said...

I am overwhelmed at your scope of understanding and resilience. Much love to you and Bliss. oxox

aspiring baker said...

Again, I am so terribly sorry this has happened to you.

I hope you're able to have a D&C and the pathology testing. (My two D&Cs and pathology testing were paid for by Aetna and BlueCross BlueShield, by the way.) After my second miscarriage I found out that the identical twins I lost had a chromosomal problem. That was a huge relief to me -- knowing what did and did not cause the miscarriage was, oddly, a great comfort. (Do you know if your twins were identical or fraternal?)

I also have found the D&Cs to be not much of a big deal physically; both times I went back to work the following day. If you get one, make sure to a) bring an iPod, and b) make sure they give you enough drugs.

Again, I am so sorry this has happened to you, and I wish you speedy healing and lots of comfort.

R and J said...

You continue to give me hope!!

Rita said...

i am sad. be strong
~Rita